"The kid's cute and I can understand why you might want to move closer to her -- but shoot, I'm cute too and if you move to Beaverton, I'll never get to see you. I'll probably patronize you and torment you with teasers about the Museum and galleries and FOOD, and then you'll get mad and give up any contact altogether -- yeesh, all that, just for an adorable granddaughter. Where's your sense of values? [add a couple of snorts in here somewhere]. "
I simply cannot let this pass without my own comment.
Dear June, you are indeed cute—adorable even. When I have moved to Beaverton and joined the Suburban Ladies of Beaverton Society, it is true that I may have no further need to associate with you, but keeping an open mind is what I'm all about and I think I will still have room in my life for you.
It is not so hard, really, to find Beaverton. They have roads that now connect Portland and Beaverton.
There is also the MAX light rail system that goes from Portland all the way to Hillsboro, with several stops in Beaverton. That is really the way to go. 
As for me, I have heard that many people from Beaverton do actually travel to SE Portland—mostly to collect the rent. ( rimshot!) Even though I have no rent to collect I expect I will still be able to find my way. Yes, I will miss some of the amenities of "the city", but there is in fact FOOD in Beaverton. Beavers are actually very tasty. And while there are no museums, the library frequently hosts very high quality, musuem quality exhibits. In fact there is currently a fascinating exhibit of German harmonicas there, so there really is no lack of cultural stimulation.
I hope I have put your mind at rest and you have been reassured that I have not forsaken you in favor of the precious Sofia.
Your faithful friend, Terry
Ok, I am laughing soooo very hard at this post. Partly because of the tone -- partly because I've had similar conversations with folks in Chicago. Thanks for the smiles -- and congrats on the new house and being closer to that darling little girl!
ReplyDeletehilarious!
ReplyDeleteVery funny, but what's up with dissing the german harmonica? I know many fine harmonica players. (snort, giggle giggle)
ReplyDelete...it's kinda like watching my sisters fight...
ReplyDeleteMaybe you'd better hang on to your Portland house as a rental. Then you can go to Portland (to collect rent) and when Sofia is growing up and thinks its cool to go to The Big City, her grandma can say "Come and stay with us for a city weekend!" College dorm? WHy not live with grandma instead?
ReplyDeleteand although beaverton doesn't have any great museums it IS close to the world famous Oregon College of Art & Craft which is just slightly NE of beaverton...in case that helps!
ReplyDeleteOh, thank you for my Monday morning laugh! I would love to live in either place instead of here in the land of sagebrush and rattlers! And when you add Sofia to the equation - no brainer to me! I liked Diane's idea! Cheers and thanks again.
ReplyDeleteI just came across your blog, and the temptation to comment is overwhelming. Will I comment about your fabulous art? No. Of course not. (It is fabulous, and I love your fusing technique.. must try that!) It is not art that not what drives the need to blab.
ReplyDeleteBeaverton. Beaverton makes me write to you. Although it is true that Beaverton is technically close to Portland, everytime I get on highway 26 I can feel my life flashing before my eyes. Time slows down, traffic stops, strange re-routes appear, and horrible drivers ooze out of the Jersey barriers. I swear it takes less time to go to Salem, Albany, or even Corvallis than it does to drive to Beaverton from Southeast Portland. How can 20 miles feel like 200? It is the wonder of HWY 26. There are some great things out your way... but I can understand June's view point completely. You didn't ask for my opinion, but.... HWY 26 makes you do strange things.
Shoot... That should read "It is not art that drives the need to blab." I got impatient, and distracted. Sorry.
ReplyDeleteThank heavens there are some sensible souls out there who know the 'orror of rt 26, coming or going.
ReplyDeleteNow I like the MAX, Terry, and I could use the exercise (a mere 5 miles) and even the German harmonicas might make me smile -- but yeeesh, it's that Suburban Ladies Association that scares the bejeebus out of me. You'll probably take to wearing suits and heels, or lunching at OCAC (well, I've been known to do that, but not with Ladies Who Lunch). And how will I ever persuade Jer to take me out of town to our critique meetings? And where will we eat when we meet -- where we won't be seen as Ladies Who Lunch but rather Important Artists Taking a Break? I meantersay....
No, I just think Sofia should come live with you. That'll take care of the problem altogether.
And h. -- it takes less long to get to sagebrush and cactus than it does to get from SE Portland to Beaverton. First you have to load up on Peets coffee and some goodies from Grand Central Bakery because you know the scarcity over there. And put your space blanket and shovel in the car, so in case the detours take you Elsewhere. Of course, you'll need a pair of snowshoes for going over the hill and a strong flashlight in case of tunnel problems. Then, there's the problem of pit stops, of which there are none. I have no useful suggestions for that, except to save the Peets until you get close to a Starbucks (for the pit, not the coffee).
They do have Starbucks in Beaverton, of course, but shucks, they do in Prineville, too, and Prineville is so much more scenic.
Oh no, now June has an ally in the person of the mysterious "h" of SE Portland. All you say about HWY 26 is true, sadly, but I have learned the secret of "the Sunset" (it took me a year to figure out that 26 is "the Sunset" and 84 is "the Banfield") and that secret is to close your eyes when you get to the scary parts and hit the gas. I believe that's what everyone else does and it seems to work.
ReplyDeleteJune, I will take your advice on the coffee and emergency supplies. My older daughter rates the trip to Beaverton as a "two book" affair. Meaning it takes too long to get there for one book to be enough. And yes, these are books with chapters, and yes she can read books in the car and not get sick. Don't ask me how she does it. It is one of the miracles of life in our neck of the woods... the woods so far from Beaverton. Sometimes I contemplate these miracles as I sit in traffic... on HWY 26.
ReplyDelete(As a serious aside.. there is a wonderful Japanese restaurant in Hillsboro. They are enough to pull me across the great divide!)
Syun Izakaya
209 NE Lincoln Street
Hillsboro, OR 97124
(503)640-3131